College · Lifestyle · Uncategorized

The Homesick Blues

This week was hard, I’m not even going to lie.  Granada is as beautiful as ever, I’m learning more and more every day, but that doesn’t mean every day is going to be the best day ever.

Up until this week, I hadn’t really spent a lot of time pining over home or missing anything in particular. But, while we all have bad days and bad weeks, the best way to get over it is to create a positive mindset.

In all honesty, I am still in my funk and I hope writing this gets me out of it, but I’ll let you know!

What has been difficult?

How do I get over it?

Take-Away Coffee

I’m not saying I’d rather be at Starbucks, but man would I kill for a grande iced vanilla latte right now.  Iced coffee isn’t a normal thing in Granada, nor is taking it to go.  The more leisurely lifestyle in Spain causes people to slowly enjoy coffee as part of a lifestyle rather than a quick boost of energy while on the go. I’m getting better about slowing my pace, but I’m still itching for a good iced latte, and Dunkin Coffee just isn’t hitting that spot, try as it may.

My Loved Ones

It feels like everyone around me has their family or their friends or their significant other visiting, and that makes me feel sad because I know I’m not going to see my loved ones until Christmas.  It doesn’t make me feel better to joke with them about visiting, but I keep doing so in secret hopes that they’ll visit.  Is it wishful thinking? Absolutely.  But it’s putting a band-aid on the bullet hole that is being away from people who understand me and who actually care about me.

 

People With Differing Opinions… Who Feel the Need to Vocalize Them Every Chance They Get

You think I should drink more? You don’t think it’s right that I’m a picky eater? Does my more conservative view on life not line up with yours? Do you feel like need to impose your personal/ political/ religious views every chance you get?

There’s a slim chance I actually asked for your opinion though…

This may be my low key, slightly petty version of a subtweet, but there’s so many people in my study abroad program from all over the country, so obviously our views are going to be different.

I don’t like drinking, or spending a lot of money on a cover charge at a club if I don’t like loud music or crowds or being drunk.  So the fact that anybody tries to make me feel badly about that or try to guilt me into going out is rude and kind of disrespectful… I don’t try to convince other people that staying in is better than going out. I tried it, I’ll go out sometimes if I feel like it, but if I don’t want to, I don’t see what satisfaction anyone gets out of making me feel bad for having a different view on partying.

I like to make my point known without being disrespectful. If I phrase something incorrectly/ disrespectfully, I immediately try to remedy my words, but at the end of the day, it’s not my job to convince anyone to believe the way I do, nor is it anyone’s job to change my point of view.

The way I made myself feel better about this point was honestly just writing about it. If someone isn’t open to changing the way they communicate, then they won’t change, but I hope someone reading this at least second-guesses the way forcing their opinion onto someone else is futile and unnecessary.

 

Party Culture

This leads back to my previous point.  I made an effort this weekend to go out to a bar after dinner, which is a typical thing to do here. I checked it off my list of things to try, and it reinforced the fact that nightlife isn’t my preference. But at least I tried it, and now I can spend my time, money, and energy on something that interests me more.

That being said, I also found a “bar” that suited my tastes just perfectly. It was jazz-themed, quiet, and exactly my cup of tea. I had so much fun sitting with my friends and talking. It may have been late at night, but I wasn’t rushing to get home because I felt my mood shift. I was somewhere I actually wanted to be, and I’m glad I took that chance and went out.  I won’t stop taking chances, since sometimes I’ll find a hidden gem, and I need to keep that in mind.

 

This Week

I’m not going to get myself down. I only have 87 days left in Granada, and I need to make the most of them.

But I also need to reflect on what’s important to me, and remember that the only person I need to listen to on this trip is myself. I can’t let anyone else’s negative opinions get to me, and I need to feel more comfortable being independent and doing things by myself, like I do at home.

This weekend I’m going to Madrid with my program, so my next blog post will for sure be more positive, since I do love Spain and this opportunity I have to travel and see the world while getting a fantastic education.

Writing this did make me feel better, and while it may have been a little sad or a little snarky, I’m sharing my electronic journal, and not every day is going to be gelato and beach resorts. Some days are hard, I just need to remind myself to make the best of everything, because I know I am so, so lucky, and I refuse to spend one more day in Spain feeling down on myself.

So until next time,

Ashley

 

 

 

 

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